Write out my remorse
I suppose I should stop avoiding the elephants in the room and just get on with it. Write out my remorse. That was supposed to be the entire point of this, no?
I just don’t know where I should begin. There’s a lot that’s been weighing heavily on my mind; a mind that doesn’t seem to want to be very present these past few days, too busy drifting between timelines.
Firstly, I’ve gone ahead and collated all past pieces of writing. Reading through them, I did not even remember our friendship - or whatever that was - after school, and how it even came to be. Then, I wonder how we faded out of each others lives again. The last I heard of you, you didn’t ask after me, and she was sorry to tell me so. It seems, both sides had remained friends, after they'd forced me out. Two sides that promised forever. I'm ridiculous for thinking that visiting any of this will help me heal. The more I think about it, the more I can’t forgive any of it, the more I want to hate you all.
Secondly, the AI slop that is now the iD website completely threw me off today, and I confess I’m disappointed, more so unnerved… wondering what is going to happen to me in the long run, if I should pivot, but to what? I almost want to laugh, I wonder if I'd sit unemployed for years. I’m this close to calling life off.